We look at the role of listening and attention-giving in effective communications.
2. Learn to listen
• treat them like young adults (not children)
• Listen carefully to their views and feelings
Effective communication requires that parents
o learn to speak with their teenager rather than at their teenager (Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers)
o engage in discussion and be prepared to debate the issues rather than repeating Simplistic slogans such as “You're too young to have a boyfriend” or “drugs are dangerous”
3. Give your full attention
• recognize the important moments to listen and give your full attention
• don't try to listen to your teenager while doing something else at the same time
• maintain eye contact; observe your teenager’s body language
Question: When have you had your best conversations with your teenager?
Home is a place where teenagers learn how to build healthy relationships.
Teenagers learn to relate through observing adult relationships
If parenting together, invest in your relationship (take our marriage course!)
If parenting on your own, build the best relationship you can with the other parent, when possible
Nurture other adult friendships
Mealtimes together – teenagers learn to talk, listen, debate issues, and respect others’ views
Regular family time – having fun together ias a family helps build relationships between parents and children and between siblings (consider having a weekly “family night”)
How can you intentionally model healthy relationships with others in your life, for your teenager to learn from?