We look at the role of listening and attention-giving in effective communications.
2. Learn to listen
• treat them like young adults (not children)
• Listen carefully to their views and feelings
Effective communication requires that parents
o learn to speak with their teenager rather than at their teenager (Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers)
o engage in discussion and be prepared to debate the issues rather than repeating Simplistic slogans such as “You're too young to have a boyfriend” or “drugs are dangerous”
3. Give your full attention
• recognize the important moments to listen and give your full attention
• don't try to listen to your teenager while doing something else at the same time
• maintain eye contact; observe your teenager’s body language
Question: When have you had your best conversations with your teenager?
We look at the role of Paying Attention to Their World, Listening for Feelings & Avoiding Interruptions in effective communications.4. Show an interest in the world of your teenageres)
ask questions about their interests and listen to their answers
treat them as unique individuals with their own points of view and personal tastes
5. Listen for feelings
allow them to express negative emotions
don’t rush in with solutions right away
6. Try to avoid interrupting
the average person listens for only seventeen seconds
resist the desire to be defensive or to butt in and correct
What affirming words can you share with your teenager this week? What one-to-one time can you plan?
