If you ask people how they are doing, how often do they include the word “busy” in their reply? We often feel we need to justify ourselves that way – I’m busy. I’m not lazy. I’m productive!
This isn’t untrue, we usually are busy! But it’s not always a good form of busyness. Negative busyness comes from a cycle of slavery to work, defining ourselves by our work, or becoming consumed by worry and guilt about work.
One inner way to combat this is with satisfaction. It starts with satisfaction in Christ – I am not God, I am not in charge of universe. God is.
I rebelled against him, but Jesus has done something incredible, in his death on cross, for me. He’s accomplished what matters most in life – he’s freed me from having to prove my worth. I don’t need to accomplish anything to know God for eternity. He’s accomplished it for me.
This can be remembered with Sabbath rest every week. Rest is an opportunity to look back and celebrate what’s been done by God, and by you. You might journal, and pray to thank God for the successes, say sorry for the failures, and acknowledge that what’s done is done.
Then you can look forward to the new week ahead, now in perspective.
Challenge: Divide a piece of paper into four columns, and think about the last work week. In the first column, write your worries, then your guilts, then your unfinished business. Now in the fourth column, write some words that represent who you are, and want to be. Where are the disconnects between this column and the others?
Loading Content...
Share a Link to this Message
The link has been copied to your clipboard; paste it anywhere you would like to share it.
It seems like every sitcom shares a feature: friends just come and go, they seldom knock or call first. Think of Friends – the characters simply came and went. You might think Seinfeld was an exception, with George and Elaine buzzing from the lobby, but don’t forget how Jerry’s neighbour Kramer just tumbles in the door. I’m sure to some degree this is about writing a good script – you can’t have a lot of down time waiting for people to answer the doorbell. But it also communicates something about the depth of their friendship.
Some researchers say these kinds of friends have what’s called refrigerator rights. The term comes from a book of the same name, but you may have heard it in pop culture, too. It defines a close relationship, where even though they don’t live there, a friend is able to come and go at will, and even eat from the other’s fridge without asking. It’s a high level of friendship.
For some people, maybe that seems natural enough. You grew up with it, perhaps. But for others, it bothers you. You might think it’s awkward, too intimate, or too trusting. You might ask, “What if I needed those leftovers for lunch tomorrow? What if that dessert was for a party? What if you come in my house while I’m in the shower, sleeping, or arguing with my spouse?”
The lines between family and friend are starting to blur in that kind of relationship. That’s the shift we’re going to explore this week in our pursuit of becoming great neighbours. We’ll look at the relationships with our neighbours that go deepest – where we become like family, with a focused, high level of friendship.
Question: How do you react to people having “refrigerator rights” in your house? Would you love more relationships that close, or are you a bit nervous?
