We’ve encouraged you to learn neighbours’ names, stories, work together, become friends, and now your challenge is to find people of peace in your life. Start sharing Redeem the Commute with them. Perhaps you could do the Marriage course with your spouse and some other couples. Or you could do the parenting courses with other parents. Then take Christianity 101 together, and then the daily challenges. Make a habit of eating together whenever you can, and talking about things that matter.
This is our vision, to be a network of small groups who are being the church. We don’t want to be a church you go to, but a church on the go. We don’t want you to just go to church, but to be the church every day. We’ll be the church when we are scattered around the GTA at work, and scattered around our various neighbourhoods, but also when we gather for community events. We started this with our outdoor movie night, and next we have a trivia night.
After that, we’ll have a Christmas event. We want it to be welcoming for local residents and families, generous for those in need, and introduces the story of the original Christmas party. We’re about to start planning, so let Ryan know if you would like to help!
In the next series, Becoming Like Family, we’ll look at what it means for you, and perhaps your own immediate family to be part of God’s family, called the church. See you there!
Challenge: Ask your person of peace for help with the party you’re planning. Then invite them to follow challenges, or another course, with you.
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It seems like every sitcom shares a feature: friends just come and go, they seldom knock or call first. Think of Friends – the characters simply came and went. You might think Seinfeld was an exception, with George and Elaine buzzing from the lobby, but don’t forget how Jerry’s neighbour Kramer just tumbles in the door. I’m sure to some degree this is about writing a good script – you can’t have a lot of down time waiting for people to answer the doorbell. But it also communicates something about the depth of their friendship.
Some researchers say these kinds of friends have what’s called refrigerator rights. The term comes from a book of the same name, but you may have heard it in pop culture, too. It defines a close relationship, where even though they don’t live there, a friend is able to come and go at will, and even eat from the other’s fridge without asking. It’s a high level of friendship.
For some people, maybe that seems natural enough. You grew up with it, perhaps. But for others, it bothers you. You might think it’s awkward, too intimate, or too trusting. You might ask, “What if I needed those leftovers for lunch tomorrow? What if that dessert was for a party? What if you come in my house while I’m in the shower, sleeping, or arguing with my spouse?”
The lines between family and friend are starting to blur in that kind of relationship. That’s the shift we’re going to explore this week in our pursuit of becoming great neighbours. We’ll look at the relationships with our neighbours that go deepest – where we become like family, with a focused, high level of friendship.
Question: How do you react to people having “refrigerator rights” in your house? Would you love more relationships that close, or are you a bit nervous?
