Last week, I told you story of my old neighbour who helped build a deck. He nicely represented the transition from strangers to neighbours to acquaintances to partners. Today we’ll go one step further. We’ll talk about becoming friends with those we work with, those we help, and those we live around.
When I was a volunteer paramedic, I remember one partner in particular. We did several shifts together, and on calls he was always nervous, and second-guessing himself, which could be challenging to work with. One day, he invited me to supper. I met his family, saw his home and farm, and in the process learned about him and his values. The next shift we had together was different. I found we could communicate better, and I could anticipate his moves. Debriefing the call afterwards was easier. I knew this quirks, where they came from, and could work from a place of partnership and friendship rather than tolerance.
This has wider application than the workplace, but some good examples of how important this is follow from a few studies:
50 percent of employees with a best friend at work reported that they feel a strong connection with their company, compared to just 10 percent of employees without a best friend at work. (A 2012 Gallup report which found that)
People planning to stick with their current job cited “good relationship with co-workers” as the major reason (67%) – above “job satisfaction” (63%), “flexible working arrangements” (57%) and even salary (which ranked seventh at 46%). A 2013 survey of 2,223 business people across Australia
In the same way, being a follower of Jesus isn’t just about doing transactions, like dealing with other followers of Jesus because you have to, or caring for others in need simply because it looks good.
We’re actually meant to become friends with those we care for, and those we care with. Not every single one to the same degree maybe, but we are actually meant to have a relationship with those we encounter in this life, and not simply use people or tolerate others.
We’ll focus this week on those we care for, those we’ve been talking about all along, and becoming friends.
Question: When have you unexpectedly “hit it off” with someone at work?
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Yesterday we saw one truth from Jesus' story about foundations in life: that we all build on one foundation or another.
Truth 2: Difficult times will come to all.
We are all subject to the same rains, winds. Both houses face the same problems, but their foundations are differently equipped to withstand such pressures.
IF built on sand, then great was its fall.
If my identity is based on a stock portfolio, then when the market drops, my life falls apart.
If my identity is built on my physical health or beauty, the moment I get older, or get a bad diagnosis, I’m shaken. I can’t be who I thought I was forever.
If my identity is on my kids becoming what I expect, I can ride high when things are good. I can be proud of their accomplishments, and so on. But that good life is easily shaken. If they make bad choices, don’t choose a prestigious career, I'm done and can do little to fix the situation.
But if my identity is not on kids, but on God, following Jesus to him, then it’s built on rock. Then if my kids make bad choices, my identity is not shaken. I will be heartbroken, but by knowing who I am and that my foundation is on a solid rock, I will be able to reach out a hand to help them while they sink in sand.
If my stock portfolio drops, I will be able to live on, knowing that I’ve invested in eternal treasure, and didn’t wrap myself up in that financial identity to the point of unnecessary risk.
As my body begins to age or sustains injuries or illness, I can see it all in perspective. My life is built on my relationship with God, and my body is meant to serve that purpose. I’m not here to serve my body.
We'll see tomorrow how that looks in practice.
Question: How can foundations in life crumble? What kinds of winds or rains expose their sandiness?
We meet for coffee every Wednesday night at Starbucks in the Chapters Store in Ajax, in Durham Region just East of Toronto. Maybe we'll see you there?
